Many times, they told me
To talk to pain
So I asked her,
What do you want me to know, pain?
What have I not yet understood?
That I am longing?
That my life is shattered?
That I have loved?
What are you trying to say?
That i’m falling into empty skies?
That loneliness washed over me
And became inseparable from my body?
That my lips are dry
And eyes are wet
And the left side of my neck
Flared up again
Because that’s how grief moves through me?
Do you want me to know
That there is lightning striking my temple?
So I collapse on the floor
Humbled by the intensity of you?
Do you want me to realize
That I am held by you?
That you will never leave me?
That no matter how much light & hope
I try to bring
You are always here, by my side
Waiting for an opening
in my now mostly sheltered heart?
Are you saying that every time
My heart receives a tender ray of light
And starts to slowly unfold her petals
Your sharpness will protect her
Like the thorns she carries?
Many times, they told me to talk to you
And now that i’m talking
You are fading
As if you know
That I knew this all along